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On Being Selfish

Posted at 11:32 AM by Krista Gorman, PA-C, on March 17, 2019

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”—E.E. Cummings

Many of us hide under a veil where we reveal only some of ourselves to the world as we yield the rest to the expectations of others…it takes courage to remove the veil and step out into the world as who we really are. Those of us who choose to remain veiled choose a life that is, ultimately, under-lived. The veil of ego is what ties us to it.

For me, ego is the same as resistance, or the building of walls. Walls can exist anywhere, at any time. Anything that blocks us from the trueness of who and what we are, is ego. Ego is a reflection of that trueness, it’s equal and opposite and without one, we wouldn’t know the other. Ego, therefore, is not to be rejected or eliminated. It’s absolutely essential for our existence here as it allows us to accomplish what we came here to do, which is to grow into the Love we are in our very essence.

We’re all trying to accomplish that, in different ways and to varying degrees. All of us are on this meandering path to our bliss-state, our state of ideal being, whatever form that may take. For one person it’s through becoming a teacher, another a gambler, yet another it’s…fill-in-the-blank. The point is, it doesn’t matter how you get there. The journey along the way reveals more and more to us about who we are.

To make the choice NOT to do this or that because of the expectations of others is a choice made from the vantage point of ego. We tell ourselves it’s for the best that we do not follow our heart, or our bliss (as Joseph Campbell said). We believe it’s too hard, too risky, etc. The bottom line is, we lack the self-love it requires to step forth into our best life. The emphasis on self-love (i.e. whether we’re following our bliss) and this is a reflection of the present state of our ego. Now, ego can be very small, as in having the belief we don’t deserve what we desire. Ego can be very large, as in believing what we think is the only way to think. There are varying degrees of ego-presence based on the energies activated within us in any given moment. When we’re able to examine our emotional state and assess the amount of fear present in our perceptions and thoughts and felt in our physical body, that is equivalent to the amount of ego present and is a great way to gauge where we are in relationship to the amount of Love vibration activated in that moment.

Joseph Campbell has also said one reaches maturity when they become the initiator of their own life. This takes courage, intention of love over ego and embedded within that is love of the Self, above all. Being self-ish is not selfish, in the popular sense of the word. I highly encourage it!

Happy St. Patrick’s Day all, may you allow for all the love and good fortune of the universe to shine upon you today. xox

Posted in acceptance, appreciation, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged buddhism, creativity, energy, existence, feelings, health, home, inspiration, life, new age, physics, relationships, religion, science, space, spirit, spirituality, St. Patrick's Day, truth

Here and There

Posted at 7:21 AM by Krista Gorman, PA-C, on July 26, 2014

My husband, daughter and I were talking yesterday about my book.

I’ve been going back and forth about the title, wanting to change it to better suit the overarching energy it carries, and “message” I’m putting out there.

The source of the book was through me “Krista” and the universe in its ever-flowing sharing and transferring of energy. The impetus was my NDE and the difficulties I had in my life following it as I struggled with reintegration back into life.

We were discussing the words used to describe the transfer of energy from one state to another. From what we call physical (our bodies that are put together) and the spiritual (our “essence” when we die). There is something else in there.

That something else is a sort of middle ground where our “self” is unified with the universal “self” and we have an experience that has been termed Near Death where we go to the Afterlife.

There is the appearance of something finite about the “life” part within the term Afterlife, and it was pointed out that it’s not really the After-life. Life, in its essence, continues on even beyond what is contained in a near death (or what I call Death experience. I actually died. I wasn’t near it.) This life is an everlasting event, and comes back around again to a something else we may not yet be aware of.

The universe is infinite. My daughter pointed out there are an infinite number of numbers between zero and one. There is an even greater number of infinite numbers between zero and two. Therefore, she concluded, the universe is even bigger than our concept. It is even more expansive than we can possibly prove or imagine.

What?!?

It needs to be experienced in order to grasp it, and we all have and will again, beyond the death experience, beyond what we call the Afterlife.

So, we came up with a new term. Interlife. Actually, my daughter did. She’s only 14. She was still in my womb when I died. We don’t know if she died too, but was on the brink when she was born. There has been no mention of any experience of the Interlife from her yet, but my guess is she experienced “something”. Her speedy recovery was what her doctor called “miraculous” and she is in a school for the gifted. Miracles occur. Every minute of every day, but that’s another subject :). Well, kinda.